Helen Morris-Brown | @hellls_bellls | TEDxSquareMile

While helping my daughter last night with a Psychology assignment, I was sucked in to the subject. The assignment was to watch a specific TEDx Talk and identify the main mechanisms the author puts in place to address our complete lack of understanding of Expectations These are as much my notes and observation on the subject, as they are a way for me to organize my goal for better self-awareness “on paper”.

Do What You Said You’d Do.

  1. Manage YOUR OWN expectations and the expectations of others responsibly.
    • If you need to change a meeting time or appointment, do it.
    • If someone is making unreasonable demands on you tell them, so expectations can be adjusted.
  2. Be Liberal With Your Compliments
    • People respond more favorably to those who increase their dopamine levels.
    • Built-in RADAR for insincere compliments. Be real, not fluffy.
    • IF you’re going to compliment, make sure it’s genuine and sincere.
  3. Treat every Text-based Communication as if it were Face-to-Face conversation.
    • When communicating digitally, don’t write anything you wouldn’t say to the person standing in front of you.
    • If there’s a response requested, respond. Timely. It’s your turn, so respect the other and respond, even if to say “I’ll have the answer later”.

“We can create great connections wherever they take place by managing our own expectations, and the expectations of other people. Because when you do what you say you’re going to do, people will associate you with good times – they’ll feel good around you. And when they interact with you, their brain and their body will be in their happy place.”

Helen Morris-Brown

These principles make a lot of sense to me. Treating people with respect and having respect for one’s time is a basic fundamental of communicating well. I can think of many situations in life where I’ve fallen very short of these basic ideas, and I’m trying to learn to be more aware of how to be a better communicator. With the buzz and pace of life today, it can be very difficult to think clearly about how our words and actions affect people’s perception of us. We ourselves can get lost in the shimmer and glow of the “instant gratification” that is the internet today. The line between what we think is real and what is so often breached that we think less about the real, and mindlessly consume whatever marketers decide is their narrative for the subject. Wake up! I’m eager to learn more on the subject.

As a marketer, I should throw in some “TUNE IN NEXT TIME” lingo, but this isn’t an episode. I’ll set no expectation for the next writing, as I have no idea when, or even if that’ll be. So I’ll respect your expectations, and tell you.. maybe.

Thanks, friends, for listening to my rant.

Chad

Related:

Why we’re unhappy — the expectation gap
Nat Ware | TEDxKlagenfurt
https://youtu.be/9KiUq8i9pbE

Take Happiness Seriously; Take Expectations Seriously.
Improve contentment, not increase consumption.